Sword Swallowing Quotes

"...I'll make thee eat iron like an ostrich,
and swallow my sword like a great pin,
ere thou an I part."

--Cade, from William Shakespere's King Henry VI, Part II

"He laughs at fear, afraid of nothing;
he does not shy away from the sword."

--Job 39:22

"The sword that reaches him has no effect,
nor does the spear or the dart or the javelin."

--Job 41:26

"He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword."
--Matthew 26:52

"Walk softly and carry a big sword"
--Sword Swallower's saying

"If the sword fits, swallow it!"
--Sword Swallower's saying

"A closed mouth gathers no sword."
--Sword Swallower's saying

"A sword down the throat is worth two in the hand."
--Sword Swallower's saying

"The pen is mightier than the sword,
but the sword goes down further!"

--Sword Swallower's saying

"It's not the Sais that count..."
--Sword Swallower's saying

"If at first you don't succeed,
don't take up swordswallowing!"

--Dan Meyer

"Don't you go swaller no rusty swords!"
--Southern Sword Swallower's saying

"My mom always said, 'Don't run with swords in your mouth!' "
--Dan Meyer

"Weird things happen when you swallow swords"
--Thom Sellectomy

"Another day, another dagger!"
--István Betyár

"Down the hatch without a scratch"
--Capt. Don Leslie

"All real, all steel,
all the way down the throat."

--Dai Andrews

"Through the lips
Over the tongue
Look out stomach,
Here it comes!
"

--Red Stuart

"One for fun,
Two for you,
Three for me,
Four to make my throat raw, and
Five just to see if I'll stay alive!"

--Sebastian Vittorini, Wasp Boy

"Gulp! And sixteen inches of cold steel start to vanish down my throat.
It's a cooling sensation - especially in summer - and helps to keep my inside free from impurities.
But doctors don't recommend this method."

--The Amazing Blondini, Ireland (1930s-50s)

"That's the fastest way to get iron in your system!"
--Melvin Burkhart

"A sword sandwich - It's kept me from starving!"
--Estelline Pike

"Of course my sword's real!
It's my throat that's fake!"

--Red Stuart

"Of course those are real swords!
I can't afford the collapsing ones!"

--Alex Kensington

"I never said it was sharp, only that it is solid,
and that I'm gonna shove it down my throat!"

--Dai Andrews

"Of course they're not sharp!
You can't swallow a sharp sword more then once!"

--Thom Sellectomy

"Mroowk maw, mngo hangmphf!"
--Dan Meyer while swallowing a sword

"You have to treat each time as if it were the first time,
because if you don't, it might be the last."

--Dai Andrews

"Life is like a double-edged sword... It can be hard to swallow,
but you just have to stick with it and push past the bumps."

--Roderick Carder-Russell

"The only person who can find a successful business entirely inside himself
is a sword-swallower."

--Nick D'Alto

"It's a hard way to make an easy living."
--Melvin Burkhardt

"I liked the reaction that fire-eating received.
I got to thinking about my spaghetti-swallowing days, and I thought,
'I bet I can swallow swords!' "

--Johnny Fox

"It was either this or basket weaving..."
--Natasha Veruschka

"My first performance was 'uncomfortable' for lack of a better word.
There were a lot of horrid noises and a great amount of discomfort.
It took me about two and a half years to develop any real degree of proficiency.
It takes a lot of patience, but good things come to those who wait."

--Dai Andrews

"The trick to sword swallowing is to be completely relaxed.
You have to relax to control your throat and your emotions."

--Estelline Pike (1961)

"Good posture is helpful.
I've been told anyone who's healthy with reasonably good posture could do it,
but it does take time and research to be able to switch off that reflex
and make sure you do it safely."

--Megan Evans (2000)

"When compelled to cook,
I produce a meal that would make a swordswallower gag."

--Russell Baker (1925-?)

"One must not hiccup while sword-swallowing"
--Richard Cohen, By The Sword, The History of Fencing

"I used to sword swallow,
but now I've got a good scar. "

--Kelek

"You get the taste of metal in your throat, and everything tastes like metal
from swallowing the swords so much, but I loved it."

--Lady Sandra Reed

"It tastes good,
like cold steel should!"

--Johnny Meah

"It tastes like a fork!"
--Dai Andrews

"Cold steel was not meant to be an after-dinner dessert!"
--Dan Meyer

"I did feel very empowered when I found I could do something
that was very uncomfortable and took a lot of willpower to achieve;
It takes some meditation, so it's almost a healthy, stress release for me."

--Megan Evans (2000)

"The essence of good performance is that it doesn't matter what you're doing, it's how you're doing it.
What becomes passé is someone doing it the same as everyone else,
with no flair for the theatrical and no care for what the audience thinks."

--James Taylor, Shocked and Amazed

"If you do something dangerous and survive, they call you a hero;
But if you do something dangerous and get hurt, they call you a stupid idiot.
I call myself a fool, but a very careful fool."

--"St. Matthew" Henshaw, Wembley, Australia

"The dangers are not what the audience thinks they are.
The apparent dangers play on primordial fears, but the real things to be afraid of
are things like getting an infection from swallowing the wrong kind of metal."

--James Taylor, Shocked and Amazed

"As for the tourists who watch me, the Germans laugh,
the Chinese like it but the Japanese run away when they see me swallowing swords.
Most likely they're afraid I'd attack them or something.
The Scots...the Scots clap, they take photos and film me, but really,
a Scot who would actually throw me some money is a real rarity.
The Poles are the most suspicious...they always want to check my swords, to see if they're real!"

--Emil Ondracek, Czech Sword Swallower

"I hesitate to tell a lot of jokes about sword swallowing
because I don't want to be known as the guy with no gag reflex
in case I ever end up in prison."

---- Travis "The Throat" Fessler, Pickled Brothers Sideshow

"Swallowing a sword is a way of swallowing your fears,
no one understands just how hard it is..."

--John Michaels (1961-2002)

"Mean people suck;
Nice people swallow!"

--Phoenix Blaze

"Sword swallowing.... that's my main thing, you know,
because fire-eaters are a dime a dozen. They're tripping over each other.
But sword swallowers are hard to find.
There's never been more than a couple dozen of them
at any given time over the past 300 years."

--Capt. Don Leslie

"I've done some research on sword swallowing...
At the moment there's 24 of us that are alive today.
And there is a world population of 6 billion people,
so that makes sword swallowing 1 in 125 million.
I guess I don't have much competition then."

--Chayne, "The Space Cowboy", Melbourne, Australia

"Sword swallowing can become addictive -
after months of practice, you start out swallowing a little dagger,
and before you know it, you're gulping down a mouthful of metal,
and get stuck being known as just the 'sword swallower'."

--Dan Meyer

"We've had people faint at our shows, because it was too intense for them.
That's the best -- better than any applause."

--Molotov Bouvier

"May your tongue not be sharper than your sword,
and your blade not run deeper than your stomach!"

--Sword Swallower's toast

"Sword Swallowing -
Because football, baseball and basketball only take one ball!"

--SSAI - Sword Swallowers Assoc Int'l

"Sword Swallowers do it to the Hilt!"
--SSAI - Sword Swallowers Assoc Int'l